Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is a time most people here in the states love. Assuming you’re not Native American. How can you say no to a homemade buffet? Friends, family and food a plenty. It’s a holiday most Americans love because it gives us all an excuse to eat the way we do every other day, but now there’s a reason. It’s just an all around good time had by most. Thanksgiving is a holiday built around gluttony, which I love. But on this day your goal is to have to loosen that belt a few notches and build that insulation for winter.

I have no problem whatsoever packing away food. I’m not a large man. Medium at best. But I do have a gift for eating semi-large amounts of food. Except on Thanksgiving. For me there is just too much pressure to eat. People want you to try everything and eat more. Maybe it’s a fairy tale fear that an old angry cannibal woman will try to cook and eat me. I’m not completely against cannibalism, but I am when the main course is me. I’m much like a turkey in that sense. But probably only in that sense.

I hate letting people down. I feel like if somebody sees me not eating their food that they might think it’s not good. I don’t think that your sweet potatoes aren’t good. I don’t think ANY sweet potatoes are good. They’re orange and have marshmallows on top. Not just marshmallows, but semi-burned marshmallows. That is not food combination I’m willing to support or enter into my food selective mouth. When in this situation I recommend you use my method of not hurting people. Fake a seizure and fall off your chair. Sweet potatoes will be the last thing on their mind. Well maybe the second to last.