I enjoy a good toothpick. I love picking food and plaque from my teeth. For whatever reason I like that before and after clean feeling. I used to steal toothpicks from Subway and stash them in an empty mint can. Being mint flavored toothpicks, I felt it appropriate to keep said toothpicks in my mint can. They’re individually wrapped and sterile for those worried that I drug them through a farm feeding trough.
The downside to toothpicks is they give me sores on my tongue which brings on a whole new set of problems. A few years ago, when I thought toothpicks made me look hard, I always kept three on my person at all time. One behind each ear, one in my mouth and occasionally one or two in my pocket. I needed to be ready to look tough at any moment. I was a trouble maker with all my TV watchin’, Rock Band Jammin’, and online video games trash talkin’. You never know when somebody is going track you down and just stare at you. When that happens, I’m ready.
The problem now is I don’t use or have toothpicks. When I have them, I don’t need them. I need them, I don’t have them. Mint flavored toothpicks make me gag now. Dead tree and mint just don’t do it for me anymore. Maybe it was a phase. Maybe toothpick quality has been declining in these dark economic times. CNN did say the toothpick and floss industries would be the first to feel the pain of this recession.
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